Smaug

I am excited to see this and I hope the movie has more of Smaug than the trailer does.

Not Dead Yet

I know, I know. My posts are sporadic and do not follow any form of schedule. 

Ever have one of those days where all you can think is "Fuck it. I don't want to die but I don't care to live any more either. Maybe, just maybe, if I hurt myself enough I'll drop this line of thought and be okay" ? If you haven't then you won't understand. If you have then you understand and know there is no easy answer. Thursday was one of those days for me. It all started on Wednesday though. 

My mental funk has been low for quite a while now. Wednesday I felt it take a sharper angle down and called out from work. Sure my sinuses were hurting but it was the mental state that kept me home. I wasn't in a hurting mood just in a "I want to sit in a dark corner" mood. I made sure I had not missed any meds and spent the day being mostly quiet and doing nothing. I made sure I would get a full night's sleep and thought Thursday would be a better day. I couldn't have been more wrong. I woke up Thursday morning groggy and grumpy. I let the dog out, checked my e-mail, fed the dog and realized it was a bad day. I was depressed, I was angry and I really wanted to hurt myself. A fall, a cut, a hit, anything to distract my mind. I would have been happy with a tooth ache (I only get those when I don't want them.) I decided to try puppy therapy and it didn't work. I realized I was getting angry at the dog for playing rough when I normally wouldn't be bothered by that. Knowing nothing good would come of me being awake I called out sick, took a swig of Wild Turkey and went back to bed. There was a time when I wouldn't have realized what was happening in my head. I'm glad that time has passed.

Today is a better day as I have no desires to hurt myself and I'm not any angrier than usual. We'll see how tomorrow goes.

Life at 110 mph

I write this from the safety of the work desk as I do not wish to get hit by the wife for the speed admission until later tonight.

It was an interesting weekend. It all started when I dropped my Harley backing it into the garage. My left foot came out from under me causing the bike and myself to fall over. Better that it happened at 0 mph than 80 mph. I strained my back trying to get it up and, luckily, my wife came to help me. I burned three fingertips , a knee and an ankle on the pipe getting it back up. Did I mention I was in shorts and flip flops? Lesson learned.

Friday was my son's 18th birthday and I could not get out of work that day so I made plans to see him on Saturday. I got up early Saturday morning, made sure I had everything I needed, gave the Harley a twice over and then hit the road from Pensacola to Montgomery. According to Google Maps it was 162 miles from my driveway to his. The ride up was uneventful. I saw a wild fox try to cross the road and then change it's mind. I also took time to think "Gee, it's cooler than I expected this morning. I probably should have worn long sleeves. Oh well. I'll be home before 8pm so no worries." Insert ominous music.

I picked my son up and went to Montgomery Harley-Davidson to pick up a dealer poker chip. We were happy to see we happened to arrive on the Hot rods and Harleys day at the dealership. My son loves the 1973 Mustang Mach 1 and they had one on display. We took time to check out all of the cars and bikes, pick up a couple of shirts and poker chips, and then head out. On the way out one of the sales people made the joke "You always need something, you just don't know what until you get here." We both laughed. Insert ominous music.

My son and I went out for lunch, saw an old friend and enjoyed spending time together. I had a great day with my son. As this was the point of the trip I consider it a success.

Then I went to get gas before leaving Montgomery. I gassed up, bought and drank a bottle of water and clickclickclickclickclickclickclickclick. The Harley won't start. I look at the battery indicator and the battery doesn't have enough juice to kick the engine over. Of course Harley hasn't made a kick start model in decades. I'm stuck! Luckily I have the extended warranty so I called them for a tow. The dealership didn't close for two more hours. Maybe I could get a new battery and get on the road to get home before sunset.

For my $50 extended warranty deductible I got: A tow to the dealership, a new battery, a new voltage regulator, a new stator, new primary oil and every wire on the Harley disconnected and reconnected. It was 8:30pm before I was able to get back on the road and almost midnight before I got home. I'm so happy the two guys working the maintenance department were willing to stay two and a half hours late to get me back on the road.

I'm now on I-65 headed South. The road is empty, the moon is rising on my left and I'm all alone with my thoughts. I would like to say I had a deep meaningful conversation with myself but that would be a lie. My only thoughts were "Damn it's cold!" I stopped at the Greenville AL Wal-mart to get a sweatshirt and another bottle of water. Further down the road and it is still empty, the moon is a little higher and I still don't have any deep thoughts worth sharing beyond "Damn it's cold!"

I soon realized speed didn't matter. No matter how fast I went I was going to be cold. Why be cold any longer than I have to? I rolled the throttle and put the Harley up to 110 mph. Why have a 110 cubic inch engine if you aren't going to enjoy it? Now I'm flying down the empty interstate, still cold, still not thinking deep thoughts and imagining my brother laughing at me if he could see me. In the midst of all this a thought finally came to me "Would a tire blowing up at 110 mph be any worse than a tire blowing up at 75 mph?" I decided not to find out and brought my speed back down to just under 75 mph. Was it 5 miles at 110? Was it 20? I don't know. I really don't. I was in a zone and just going.

I got home around 11:30 pm. It was a helluva day.

Here's a dragon on a skull for your pleasure.

Life: The Game

Things have been better for me in the last couple of weeks. It took time but I've come out of the dark and find myself enjoying the shadows. My wife and dog have a lot to do with me doing better mentally.

Today is my son's 18th birthday. Even though facebook seems to think he is older than that. Happy Birthday Russ! Daddy loves you!

Tomorrow I plan to ride up to Montgomery to spend the day with him. This will be my longest ride on the Harley so far. I'm looking forward to it. I'm thinking three hours up and three hours back on my own will give me plenty of head clearing time. Hope my old ass can handle it.

I'm still enjoying Neverwinter and I'm still amazed at all it offers considering it is a FREE game. Blog stuff here.

My dog, Irdin Silverbow, is growing so fast! And yes, that is his name. In the picture below you can see how big he was on April 6th 2013 and then on May 18th 2013.

Dragon's Lair

Dragon's Lair!

If you didn't play this in a video arcade then you haven't really lived. I don't know how many quarters I fed this game but I know it was a lot. I'm sure my parents were giving me odd looks when I was ask for more quarters to play it.

Kids and younger adults today probably look at it and think "What's all the fuss about? The scenes are too short, there are only 5 options for the character to use and it isn't even 3D!" Well these people can go suck a dragon egg. This game was and still is awesome! At a time when all video games used sprites to represent the characters and 3D was done with red and blue lenses this game was a break through. It was a cartoon you could actually play!

Of course when this game came out cartoons weren't as accessible as they are now. If you slept in on Saturday morning you missed your weekly allotment of cartoons. If you were lucky, your parents had cable, you got home from school on time and nobody made you do your homework right away you might have been able to catch Tom & Jerry on TBS during the week.

The princess is waiting. Go save her!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHXrrSukbp4

Do You Remember...

... when Rock 'n' Roll was fun?

What Is The Order

Let the conspiracy begin! And the drinking as well.

www.whatistheorder.com